When their laugh becomes a problem.
They call sex “making love”.
When they try to convert your religion.
They give you a black eye if you confront them.
They like beer pong.
They rub ash all over their face saying they’re “lower than dirt” just to get your attention.
They justify fighting.
They fight random people for no reason (or really bad reasons).
They have an imaginary audience.
They’re married.
You’re married.
You’re not in love with them.